I re-entered Myanmar now with my correct exit stamp and my man from the Assam army still in tow as I got through immigration. Luckily I was right, not the Australian guy I met in India there was no requirement for a tour guide or itinery of approved booked hotels requested. They did ask me where I was staying tonight and where I was heading but that was it.
I then ended up at a liquor store to change my money which was about £200. I had done my homework again and knew I should be getting about 326,000 Kyat but the woman there offered me 317,000. This was not far off for a back street border transaction I tried to negotiate her to 320,000. Her response was I have lots of rupees from all the Indian who come to buy my liquor and a fine selection. She had even an Arran whisky which reminded me of when I got shipwrecked there due to a distillery trip but that's another story. It was take it or leave it and as I didn't see any other exchange places I took it.
I can understand now why the road to the border was so bad as there is just a narrow bailey bridge across the river symbolically painted different colours which shows the demarcation. There was no vehicular movement with all goods having to be unloaded and then portered across using handcarts.
I stayed in a guest house overnight and headed out the next morning. I had yesterday planned out my route through Myanmar to take in the sights I wanted to see using up the full 28 days I was permitted to stay and deliver me to the Thailand border on the 22 December where I would take a few days off in Mae Sot over Christmas.
I would from here head south east to get to Mandalay then travel due south to Yangon before turning east gain back through Baco and on towards Thailand.
It was 80 miles to the city of Kalaymyo so I had allows two days to complete this as it was through the mountains and then I would be on the flat for the rest of my time here.
So 40 miles needed today and as I dropped out of town I passed the compound where the ever present minivans were loading up to start passing me all day. I was trying to work out which side of the road I should be on and suspected it was now the right but with just motorbikes travelling in random directions it was difficult to tell.
I dropped down to a narrow bridge and then the fun began again.
As soon as I rounded the corner the road ramped up at an alarming angle. I had worked out by now that I should be cycling on the right but my policy at present was not left or right side of the road but anything I could find some traction on.
Soon I hit the usual morning layer of mist but was still covered in sweat from my excursions and started to think perhaps I'd be better off turning round and doing a deal to get me bike on the roof of a minivan.
Still more climbing and past a pack of mules which was an ominous sign of things to come but I kept subduing the thought of turning back chanting the mantra, it can't be like this all the way..... it can't be like this all the way.
I did eventually make it to the peak and already 5-6 vans had passed loaded up. There was a decent to come so this was the point of no return. I passed it but as I descended the next big climb opposite came into view and it was massive!
I dropped into the next valley and stopped at the suspension bridge over the river to consider my options. Whilst stopped, I watched a large truck shedding some of it's load to a smaller one so it could make it up. According to the profile I had 75 miles left and the first half of that was up so about 30 miles at least of climbing.
My hopes of doing this in two days vanished a crossed to the other side and contemplated waiting at the cafe there for a lift but it was teaming with military. With wild camping being illegal I didn't want to answer any awkward questions about where I was going to be staying tonight and thought I'd better press on and see how I go.
Badly was the answer. I will not bore you with the self pity of the rest of the day but it was grim. At one point my bike had had enough and rather then go round a tight hairpin whipped around and decide to head downhill but I managed to bail out before it hit the deck. I don't know how the bike survived I was pulling wheelies at some points and that is with three bags on the front remember.
Anyway at 5 pm I made it to the village of Laaitui Khua and fell into a roadside cafe for a quick bite to eat as it would be dark in a hour and I wanted to get through the village and find a place to camp. They put on a fantastic spread for me of rice veg and chicken and I was chatting to the owner who spoke good english and he said you look very tired would you like to stay here tonight?
I took up his offer so that was the end of by far the worst day of the trip. 9 hours on the road but only 26 miles covered, to put this into perspective my previous record was 36.
I relaxed then and sat outside there with the owner and his kids enjoyed playing with the comedy horn Stu had provided for India.
I couple of lorries had now turned up to cool their brakes using a water tank the cafe had and they were via the owner quizzing me on my journey and taking turns to try and lift my bike.
Then the owner said "they would like you to follow them" I said no it is getting dark thinking I was losing my lodging here. " no you can follow them" he said, again I said I am very slow and pushing it would not work. Then the penny dropped I said " do they want to take me?"
The guys eyes lit up yes he realised his mistake in translation Yes! they want to take you. I did a quick assessment of the situation.
Had I suffered enough - Yes
Would I like a day off rather then two more days in this hell hole - Yes
Was I getting on a truck -Yes
Yes I said I would love a lift. They started climbing up the side of the truck and maneuvering my bike which quickly left the ground when I said WAIT!
Everyone froze. Where are they going I asked? The cafe owner checked and Kalaymyo was the response.
Carry on I said and that was the end of my Mayanmay mountain adventure.
I was very glad I took the truck option the road conditions were no better for the rest of the journey with another couple of stops required to cool the truck brakes with water. At about 10 pm I was deposited at a nice hotel on the outskirts of the city which the driver's sister had found for me and I booked in for two days to recover.
I was now four days behind with the blog so managed to get that up to date on my day off. I re-book another hotel in Mae Sot for Christmas as the first had come back to say they had nowhere secure to store my bike. I also booked my flight home from Singapore on the 1st April, a sure sign that I'm coming towards the close of this little ride but still 4 months to go.
OK time to head south it is 143 miles to the next city I've scheduled this for two days so I need to average 72 miles today but gave myself a stretch target of 82 which was where a restaurant and store was shown on my map. If I could make it, this would be a good place to grab some food and supplies before looking for a camping spot and also reduce the distance I have to do tomorrow.
I got off to a good start mixing it up wit the traffic leaving Kalaymyo and had to rein myself in from racing the scooters and strange sidecar taxis which are prevalent here.
I soon escaped the city and found this girl shaking her tin outside a monastery.
I think those canny monks knew what they were doing sending her out to stop the traffic.
I noticed first women and then some men with light mud on their faces on my last day in India and more so here. I originally thought was for protection from the sun but then patterns emerged and further research confirmed that this was a form of decoration and certainly saves money on the old Max Factor.
I made a donation in the bowl behind and sped off with the road now deteriorarting and some challenging plank bridges to negotiate without my wheels falling down the cracks.
Soon there were hills coming over the horizon and my heart sank as I thought I had finished the major climbs now but the road soon latched onto a river bank and together we sithed through rolling past a few more temples along the way.
I had covered 30 miles in an hour and a half and was on target for my 80 mile day when next to appear was a bridge across the river.
This was my turning point to start heading south I was now the Myanmar India Friendship Road which was still under construction. Soon I was having to mix it up with the heavy plant that was forming the new road and the only route onwards was to pick my way through the site I couldn’t ever see this happening in the UK.
The route got more challenging now as I had to weave around on a dirt road route which had some sand traps to try not to get stuck in.
I then I came to a section which had been sprayed to reduce dust but had been reduced to thick mud.
My back wheel lost traction and I was over.
I recovered the bike and pushed my way out but was now wearing a pair of mud platforms and the back wheel was clogged up. It was like cycling with your brakes on but I limped along to a cafe where I had a drink whilst I waited for the mud to dry. I then had to remove the wheel and chisel away with a tyre lever to try and free it up.
As I worked, I noticed that my rear mudguard had broken off where I had fixed it in before in Bishkek no doubt pushed out by the accumulation of mud. I wasn't going back to find it.
I battled on and at 40 miles reached a village and pulled into what looked like a shop/cafe. I got a drink but when I asked about food they pointed to some packets of noodles which was not what I was after. I knocked my drink back paid and made to leave when the man told me to sit down. His wife laid out some bananas and peanuts for me to eat which she supplemented with some newly sun dried bananas which she brought in.
I wolfed down a polite amount whilst showing my route to them on my phone, I asked what I owed them for the food. They would not accept payment and even packed some more up for me to take with me how nice!
At 60 miles I had another stop but time was against me now and it was clear that my 82 mile stretch target was not going to happen so thought well let’s at least get halfway and to 72. I got to 70 and found a track leading into the forest to dived down in but with an early start in the morning and hopefully some better roads I should do better tomorrow.
OK I had the residual of 74 miles to do today but before I even set off I was in trouble I had checked the route before I went to bed and it showed a big hill to climb which I’m sure was not on Strava added to that something had disagreed with me and I was up in the night in a cold sweat trying not to be sick and was not in a good way this morning.
I set off the next day and almost instantly hit a steep hill that had me pushing up. I did manage to ride some of it but at one point of extreme excretion something gave had to dump the bike and dive into the bushes for an emergency loo stop.
I arrived at a shop shown on the map covering 5 miles in one and a half hours so it was effectively game over already to reach Monywa today but thought let's get as much covered as I can and hopefully I’ll get there tomorrow.
The climb eventually gave way to downhill section where I crossed a river where you can see people were cultivating crops right up to the water's edge.
I started to climb again and then ran into the new road being constructed from the south. Great, I thought maybe this will take out the hill but no all too soon I was back on the old road trying to get up a suicidally steep slope with my speedo steadfastly stuck on 0.00 mph.
I did get some help from the locals thought one guy stopped his scooter and assisted me to get my bike upright after a fall and another saw me pushing and lent a hand to the next spot where I could start to ride again.
Eventually after a few false sumits I had a welcome drop down meeting up again with the new road and was then delivered onto a flat plain which I really hoped would continue for the rest of the day.
Just to crush me more to compensate for it being flat, the construction team covered the road with pea gravel what the….. I was on the deck again as my front wheel dug in and over I went so ended up pushing through it.
I decided then that it was time for a break and battled my way across the road to a shop where I bought some fizzy orange.
I was feeling better now but played it safe on the food front with some sort of dehydrated madeira cake which was bone dry but the lady fortunately poured me a tea which helped.
Eventually the gravel cleared and what was this tarmac, flat smooth tarmac???
I got going again and set myself a target of 37 miles for the day which would be half the distance I had hoped to achieve and if the terrain was good tomorrow should see me in for lunch. I ended up doing 40 riding past countless smallholdings until I found an open field which I pushed my bike into it and set up camp for the night.
Very strange checking my route it showed a peak of about 500 ft but what I actually did was over 2,500 with a maximum gradient of 37.5% anything in double figures and I struggle with this set up.
The next morning I could see why this space was uninhabited as at 4.20 am a loudspeaker nearby started blaring out a temple service for an hour and then someone put on Now That's What I Call Buddhist 32. No lie in for me then but at least the early start and the short distance ment time for a brew and some porridge.
What a difference a day makes with the flat tarmac and cool morning air I was absolutely flying I thought with 33 miles to go I'd have a stop after 15 but that came within the first hour so I thought well maybe at 15 to go but that was soon upon me and I was still powering through.
Break at at 10 miles to go then but that whizzed by and soon I could see the bridge across the Chindwin river which would take me into Monywa just beyond. I also spotted a temple off to the right so swung up the side road for a bit of sight seeing otherwise at this rate I'd be arriving at the hotel for breakfast.
Next to the temple was a small zoo which I popped my head into and as I suspected was somewhat juxtaposed to the Buddhist teachings on the treatment of animals with some bored looking animals kept in small enclosures.
Onwards over the bridge and a lovely view up the river which I tried to capture using my phone as I've binned my look-a-like GoPro with the scratched lens and I was done for the day.
Not an afternoon of rest thought as I cleaned me, my clothes, my panniers, my bike and replaced some worn out pedal lugs. I also had to clean up a ruptured tube of antiseptic cream which had leaked into my pannier and all over my tent as all my drybags now have holes in them from the level of attrition.
Secondly, I had an explosion of an instant coffee sachet in my handlebar bag which with the humidity had turned into well coffee with milk and one sugar. This had then coated everything so it all had to come out be wiped down and dried.
I did however get time later in the day to bag another temple and take in the street food stalls at the night market but didn't chance trying any of the fayre.
The extra day on the road had put me behind schedule but I had a fall back which was that I had built in a five day round trip to Nyang-U to take in a couple of temples but on the basis of my experience so far temples were not hard to come by. So decided to ditch that idea and go for the two day straight line route to Mandalay. That then meant I was now two days ahead of schedule, you following all this?
The next day was planned to be a big 85 miler which even on flat tarmac would be a slog so I decided to cash on one of my above bonus days and split than in two. This was a decision which was vindicated when unknown to me I got out the hotel map and found on my doorstep.
A massive pagoda adorned inside and out with half a million (yes I checked) statues of Buddha. Amazing!
And only the second tallest statue/Buddha in the world!
The statue itself is 27 storeys high so would be looking down at you having cocktails in Cloud 25 at the Hilton in Manchester.
Inside contained floors of murals which depicted the retributions which would be inflicted on you for any sins committed in your life.
Now I'm no great religious scholar but that seems to be an awful lot of stick there that Buddha and his able assistants are wielding. I do hope there are some carrots along the way and maybe some means of retribution.
Say for example, in the petulance of your youth and a fit of peak, you go and set light to a cow well your toast aren't you. It doesn't matter what you do in later life you know what's coming so you might as well leave the toilet seat up and use the last of the coffee as you are never going to punished for those crimes which I presume are depicted elsewhere above after getting torched for that cow!
The statue itself was situated in a kind of Disneyland or Buddhaland complex where you had the choice of Buddhas in every shape and position, reclined, seated, flat on his back, riding many elephants or just row and rows and row of them. Take your pick.
After my cultural tour I had 30 miles left to cover and continued on to to meet up again with the highway and the Road to Mandalay.
It was no left turn when I got to the highway which was to force the traffic back and through a toll gate but as I was exempt I weaved through the bollards. This caused a bit of an accident as a car approaching was obviously so distracted by the sight of a westerner on a bike that they forgot to brake and rear ended the car at the back of the toll queue!
Fortunately this being a highway these were real cars not the death traps seen around town and the occupants seemed OK. I though hmm best make a sharp exit here before I get embroiled in this and somehow blamed for riding the wrong way down the road so sped off in the opposite direction and left them to it.
After that excitement it was rather a dull end to the day which I rattled off by 3.30 pm. I didn't stop for any food and I was still digesting the huge plate of chicken noodles and veg I had from breakfast.
I found a pretty basic hotel for the night and then had a strange experience when the lady there was trying to stop me leaving in the evening to get some food. I think she thought foreigners were not allowed on the streets after dark.
Fortunately her son intervened and I was released.
I made my way to a bar down the road where I managed on my second attempt to order some food using the menu I had photographed on my phone from my first hotel.
Getting a beer was easier as you just had to point at anything in there which all seemed to have been provided by Tiger Beer.
There was no sign of breakfast the next day so I headed off down the road.
Ten miles down the road I pulled over at a roadside shelter and took out the giant pear that was given to me at the hotel in Monywa sliced it up into manageable sized pieces and ate that which was delicious.
Just 30 miles to go now to get to Mandalay. I broke that in two and called in half way at a cafe for a cup of coffee and a cold drink where I was joined by some students who were keen to practice their English.
They told me there was an impressive temple up the road that was painted white for the next year and I should visit which I did very impressive!
As I was leaving the temple I saw some girls all dressed up so hurried out to get a picture but could see them heading to some brightly decorated ox carts and horses.
Then I realised they were actually boys dressed as girls and I have to say they didn't look too impressed by their transformation. I'm not sure what all that was about but keep reading, I discovered more later.
On the way into Mandalay there was a causeway built over a lake which was listed as a highlight so I checked that out but the lake seemed to have dropped in height so it was more like a boardwalk over a muddy field
There was nowhere secure to leave the bike so I just took a quick snap and left or tried too. I didn't see a large rock behind me and as I backed away my foot got wedged between it and the pedal. The bike started to go over but with my foot trapped I couldn't put it out or jump away so ended up trapped under the fallen bike.
I laid there like an upturned turtle but some locals came to my aid, they helped me back up and to fix my front mudguard. Once I'd got over my embarrassment I thanked them and left.
Earlier in the day I got a Whatsapp message from a friend of a friend who lived in Mandalay so we arranged to meet up when I got there. When he arrived I remembered we had met before years ago in Manchester and it was good to see a friendly face. He gave me a lift out to see the sunset from the roof of the Ayarwaddy River View Hotel which, it will come as no surprise to you, overlooked the river.
Things got a bit lairy after that and with a shed load of beer the rum cocktail and a couple of Jagermeisters I was not in the best shape in the morning. So decided the best cure for my hangover was to sweat it out climbing Mandalay Hill. What was I thinking!
It was long trousers required and you also had to take your shoes and socks off as you were required to climb barefoot.
This was all out of respect for all the many tat shops, astrologers and food vendors who lined the route and hawked their wares as you climbed.
Between the vertical bazar there were set pagodas containing images of that cute little fella Buddha again and a temple at the top where some of this goblins were taking a time out from inflicting retribution on poor sinners to pray.
Once I got to the bottom of the hill I booked a tuk tuk but as I was waiting for this to arrive what I assume was a wedding party went passed with the groom on an elephant and then more of those boys dressed as girls riding on horses then girls dressed as girls following behind. The last one looks like she should try out for the Hydeburn Majorettes.
Unfortunately, I thought I was being clever and recording this in landscape but now I can't get it the right way so you will just have to crane your necks for a few minutes but it's worth it.
I popped into a youth hostel where I ended up last night for a pizza as I'd left my cycling helmet there. I'd arrived on a motorbike and left in a tuk tuk, in my delicate state I forgot to pick it up but it was sat there behind the counter when I walked in. Just a couple of doors down was a spa so I went for a massage to work out the effect of the last few weeks on the road I got paired up with a male masseur who really went to town on my calves which were tied up in knots after all that bike pushing.
I met Tommy for a swift beer by the pool at the Mercure hotel then hopped over to the Ritz to catch the sunset really living the life.
We hit a rock bar after than and having said how disappointing my pizza was Tommy took me to a place that served the best. The night was a bit curtailed when Tommy's girlfriend arrived and called time but I think that might have been for the best.
I had a slow start the next morning but was on the road by ten am with just 50 miles on what were predicted to be flat roads. Once I had battles my way out of the city partially on a segregated route just for scooters I found the old A1 which had been superseded by a new Expressway running down the country so was thankfully pretty quiet.
I managed to bag another temple on the way. This was a close as I was going to get to this one as walking barefoot up that hill was not going to happen so I was back on the bike and away.
The place I was aiming for was a small town with no hotels shown on MapsMe there was one on Google but no indication if it was open to foreigners but also a couple of monasteries which I could try as they give basic accommodation to visitors as well.
Anyway that plan all fell apart when 30 miles in I arrived at the city of Kyaukse and a nice looking hotel. I was still not feeling great after two nights out on the lash and decided if I could get in here I would call it a day, or more to the point a half day and hopefully will be up for it to crack on tomorrow and do 70 miles to get me back on track. There was room at the inn so it was game over.
The next morning after a substantial breakfast which included four samosa I was refueled refreshed and raring to go. I was back on the old A1 which was a perfect surface for me flat tarmac and not much traffic as the mile or to be exact kilometre posts counted down the distance to Yangon.
65 miles were required today so I did a 20 miles stint then thought I would break the rest of the day down into three 15 mile sections. I was not too hungry when I made my first stop as it was just past 9 am but did find a well stocked shop.
Here I spotted my first look alike porridge flavoured Magnum for a second breakfast together with a substitute snicker.
I just had a quick drink at the next stop and with 15 miles to go I pulled in for a couple of bags of crisps to put some salt back into my body and spotted another look a like for the day Smarties!
I headed out of the town and pulled in at one of the many roadside rest shelters which you find here which are all well maintained no litter or grafitti and don't smell of wee.
They usually have some some drinking water available in large containers which someone must be responsible for re filling each day. These were great help as I made my way south.
I made excellent progress with the good road, long may that continue and arrived at Meiktila by 2 pm so was able to have a leisurely lunch by the lake.
I grabbed a room in a hotel nearby and then had some time to take in the sights before returning to my table to watch the sun go down.
As I rode out of the city I noticed how much of a military hub this place was, I passed an airbase together with and armoured battalion barracks on the way in but was now passing another three infantry and an armoured battalions on the way out whilst a couple of jet fighters were flying around in formation.
I also noticed that the duck boat was the logo for Myanmar beer which is brewed here I know this as I passed the brewery on the way in.
Not a big day today as only 40 miles to cover so I had a slow start and spent some time this morning organising accommodation and looking at sights to visit in Yangon when I eventually get there.
I also visited the supermarket up the road and was delighted to see they had peanut M&M's which are my favorite and I hadn't seen since Kathmandu.
They were not cheap at 75p each so I only bought a couple of packets for the trip.
I started off and was fantasising about the M&M until I would last no longer.
At just over 6 miles into the 20 mile first section pulled over and wolfed down a packet.
Soon after that I managed to catch up to and was keeping pace with and ice cream float which had a tape loop playing saying something like "Ice cream ice cream who wants an ice cream" . I felt like Chris Hoy like some form of street keirin with a frozen confectionery based derney ( it might catch on!)
We were on a deserted road so no one pulled him over and after a couple of mile "Ice cream ice cream who wants an ice cream" or more to the point "ရေခဲမုန့်လိုချင်တဲ့ရေခဲမုန့်ရေခဲမုန့်!" the novelty wore off so in a variation of the keirin rules I upped the pace and overtook him.
This was a bad move as the speaker was facing forwards and so just got louder "ရေခဲမုန့်လိုချင်တဲ့ရေခဲမုန့်ရေခဲမုန့်!" I was no longer in his slipstream and couldn't shake him so after a few miles of this in another break with the rules I pulled over at a shop for some pop and crisps and let the derney go.
I rode to the edge of the town and saw some benches I was just about to sit down then I noticed the snake!
I carried on down the highway and came to an interesting stretch where instead of selling food and drink at the roadside stalls there was a run of selling daggers and samurai swords! Very strange.
The rest of the day was pretty uneventful and I rolled into the only hotel in town at just past 3 pm it had no Wifi, dirty rooms and they wanted £20 for B&B. Last night's accomodation was much better and only cost £12.50. What a rip off but what can you do when they have the market sewn up?
The hotel got worse in the morning breakfast was advertised from 6.30 on the fourth floor but when I rolled up at ten to seven there was nothing setup and no sign of any staff.
The concierge was asleep in the lobby so I tossed my key on the desk and headed off. I was heading to the new capital of Naypyidaw and had a nice hotel I had found online which was reasonably priced and had a pool. It was 55 miles away but my thinking was if I got an early start and a wriggle on I could be there for lunch and a swim.
I got my head down and swept past the roadside product of the day which today was nwo bamboo furniture.
I also managed to bag the temple of the day,
I did spot a massive one to the north on the way into the city but the lure of a pool was too great to consider a diversion I'm sure there will be more temples to come.
The hotel was on a business park on the outskirts of Naypyidaw which seemed to have all the charm of Milton Keynes so I was not bothered about venturing into the centre but at £22.50 for B&B this really put last night's dump to shame.
My next stop was Taungoo 65 miles south where I intended to have a rest day but the day after that I had a conference call in the afternoon with my client and checking the route that would mean 75 miles to ride which might be tight to get to a couple of small motels neither had reviews and might not have a wifi signal good enough to make the call.
I weighed up the opinions which were:
risk it
have a second day off in Taungoo where where were a number of hotels
bin the day off and keep going which would mean a 50 mile ride to the city of Bago
I decided to go for option 3 on the basis that Taungoo didn't strike me as a place for two days off and given current performance if I got on the road early again I could get there by lunchtime and have the afternoon to sightsee.
The hotel did not disappoint with breakfast and having fueled up enough not to slow me down I opted for a two stop strategy, (starting to sound like Formula One this) with a long first 25 mile sector then two 20 mile sessions to finish the distance off.
I got on the road at 7.30am and was struck, as I was on the way in, at the ambitious scale of the development of Naypyidaw which does not seem to have come to fruition. There were massive roads which looked about ten years old still sything through empty fields.
Researching the trip I found out that whilst the capital and government has moved here from Yangon (formally Rangoon) a lot of the embassies and commerce had not relocated which might account for the obvious lack of expansion.
I realised too late that I was not going to pass through the city centre itself which was a shame and ended upon the four lane empty highway shown in the last picture.
I then came to a no cycles and motorbikes sign so pulled off to a concrete side track.
As soon as I made the change about ten scooters passed me on the highway in quick succession and I though the sign was a bit ambiguous and reasoned that scooters must outnumber cars two or three to one so there is no way all the scooters should be on this strip. So maybe the sign was for this side track and I should not be on it.
I rejointed the highway and thought well if I'm wrong they will throw me off which is exactly what happened a mile or so up the road when I was waved over by a soldier with a gun no messing with these guys!
Anyway soon all these impressive but seemingly unnecessary roads came to and end and I was back on the good old A1 with no traffic segregation and the countdown to Yangon continued, 296.5 km to go.
I made my first 25 mile sector within an hour and a half and was on course for a lunchtime finish.
This pace continued throughout the morning with me pushing had and with the last 5 miles to go set myself the target of 1 pm to be at the first hotel I would try for the night.
I hit the city limits with then minutes to go and gave it everything I had was not slowed down by the traffic and managed to make it with five minutes to spare.
I was able to get a room which I then discovered had a bath what a bonus!
No time for a soak now though it was a quick shower and then into the city for a spot on lunch.
Then it was on to explore before the sun went down I was right an afternoon was enough the highlights of which are below:
I later came back to the hotel to discover it had a bigger bath downstairs so dived into that for a refreshing swim!
The next morning I had to pay 1,000 Kyat for a dink from the mini bar when I realised the replacement I had bought had the price (half what the hotel charged) written in permanent marker damn. The receptionist said I'd also used the pool so that was another 5,000.
I gave her a 5,000 note and said that now saying there was a charge for the pool was a bit cheeky as I had asked twice about it and no one had mentioned any extra cost. She gave me 4,000 change and took a call so took that as winning the argument loaded up my bike and set off.
Back on the A1 and grinding out the miles.
The scenery of flat roads was getting a bit monotonous by now but I brighten up my bike with some Christmas decorations I’d picked up yesterday and continued on my way.
I‘ve seen in the countryside that these vehicles which are a sort of pick up with a basic rotorvator type engines are the beasts of burden around here.
When I first entered the country I thought it was a backyard bodge up but then saw more and more of them. You can even get a new one off the shelf.
Of course the real beasts of burden continue to be these old girls!
Getting on for an 80 mile day I had three stops and made sure I got a decent rest. The first stop I had a banana based theme demolishing the treats I’d spirited away at breakfast.
Break two was a selection of prawn and fish crackers with pop which didn’t quite hit the mark so I supplemented with some salted cashew nuts from my pannier supplies. Finally I had a proper meal for lunch of soup and vermicelli which was pretty much a re-run of breakfast.
I rolled in at 3.30pm so would have been tight for my 4 o'clock conference call tomorrow so a puncture, headwind or rough road could have put pay to that.
I overshot the hotel looking to see if there was any nice looking restaurants which there were not but did find the temple of the day.
The first hotel was full so I ended up down the road in a kids room with some trestle tables for beds with paper thin mattresses so had to get out my sleeping mat.
I headed out to a coffee shop I saw on the map and had a really nice cappuccino and a not so nice blueberry cake.
I asked what time they opened in the morning as there was no breakfast at the hotel but they had given me a kettle so my back up in the morning was some instant porridge which I had carried from Dushanbe.
We open at Seven am was the response so the porridge was put on hold and I would be back here in the morning.
I then headed down the mainstreet and found a restaurant I was not too hungry having a reverse meal of coffee and sweet first but ordered some chicken and rice however this is what turned up!
I didn't manage the soup or the plate of raw veg at the back which I guess they could reuse but the little bowls of cooked veg were delicious. At the end I thought hello, have I been done over here what is this going to cost but when the bill came it was £4 including two large beers bargain!
I didn't get a good night's sleep I was too full and my room faced the main road that ran past the hotel. Through to the early hours lorries trundled past with their horn blaring then when that died down I had a chase round a mosquito that had got into my room. The next morning suffering from a lack of sleep and coffee I was back at the cafe and ordered a plate of noodles which is standard breakfast fayre when I thought I'm still full from last night!
I managed to eat the noodles as fuel is fuel and this will power me for the 50 miles I need today mounted the bike and was off.
I rode past a line of novice monks dressed in pink who are sent out into the community each morning to collect offerings. No doubt whilst the ordained monks if that's the right word have lie in and a fry up!
Choice of two temples of the day first I passed this brightly coloured Buddhist offering on the road.
Then as I entered the city of Bago the Hindus pulled this one out of the bag but which gets your vote?
I had a good day in the saddle and was in by lunch which I obviously skipped as I was still digesting breakfast. I got showered washed my kit and prepared for my catch up call with my client.
Tomorrow I have a day off so more temple photos expected.
Bago as advertised is awash with buddhist temples but I did also visit the royal palace which was a reconstruction built in the 1990's but still an impressive buildings if not getting a bit shabby now.
Photos are below:
In a crowded market it's good to have a USP so these monks in the Snake Monastery have surprise surprise a old and revered snake which pulls the crowds in and the wonga.
I also got a 25p hair cut which was slightly better VFM than the last one and might have got more than I bargained for or less whichever way you look at. It might get myself a pink sheet and go collecting!
Right last push to Yangon (formally Rangoon) and then a few days off but I managed to bag another temple on the way out.
I started on the good old A1 and then took a minor route into the city which I hoped would have lighter traffic but unfortunately this was not the case.
I got squeezed a bit by busses and lorries when they tried to overtake against oncoming traffic which was a shame as so far it's been a resounding thumbs up for the drivers of Myanmar.
There was quite a lot of campaigning to be seen as I traversed the country with an election coming up in 2020. Unfortunately the democracy here is limited and the old "Generals" still hold a large number of seats in the parliament and a veto in certain areas. They are also involved in a lot of the illegal jade and drugs trafficking and other organised crime. There are no McDonalds in the country as the General what the franchise and they will not deal with them which is pleasing to see.
As I continued south towards the coast the landscape changed to more of a wetland environment reminiscent of the Florida everglades not that I've been there.
But I was soon hitting the outskirts of the city and into the traffic but progress what quite good. As advised by Tommy motorbikes and scooters are banned from the centre of Yangon and I thought I might have an issue but was not the only cyclist on the road so I thought I should be OK and presses on weaving through the gaps without much competition.
My right thigh was playing up which was a bit of a worry but hopefully a few days off will give this a rest. I managed to get to my hotel a posh one for the next few nights for a treat then I might extend for a couple of days I have in hand but we'll see.
Taking advantage of the hotel with a full english breakfast followed by cheese and biscuits where I tried to eat my own (reduced) body weight in emental!
This reminded me of the days when my sister was training at St. Thomas' Hospital in London and we used visit and go for breakfast in the Waldorf Hotel. We'd stuff our faces and my Mum's handbag with food and pots of Robinsons jam then head out for the day sightseeing and not need any lunch.
I had a massage on the first day and ached like hell after so it took another two daily sessions to work out the knots and strains in my legs and shoulders. This being the case I ended up cashing in my two days in hand and staying longer although I moved hotels to help the budget.
It was great to have a few days of in Yangon and explore this city which is steeped in history. There were some great colonial buildings some not is such good repair and I visited the old Secretariat building which was the administrative seat of British Burma and then the parliament after independence. Now the capital has relocated north it is celebrating 130 years since its construction and being refurbished as a museum and commercial space.
I think however it is such a shame to have relocated the capital and turn their back on all this history.
After a couple of days off temple spotting I relented and visited the reclining Buddha and the Shwedagon Pagoda.
Google alert! - The Shwedagon Pagoda is the most sacred Buddhist pagoda in Myanmar, as it is believed to contain relics of the four previous Buddhas of the present kalpa. These relics include the staff of Kakusandha, the water filter of Koṇāgamana, a piece of the robe of Kassapa, and eight strands of hair from the head of Gautama.
The stupa's plinth is made of bricks covered with gold plates. Above the base are terraces that only monks and other males can access. Next is the bell-shaped part of the stupa. Above that is the turban, then the inverted almsbowl, inverted and upright lotus petals, the banana bud and then the umbrella crown. The crown is tipped with 5,448 diamonds and 2,317 rubies. Immediately before the diamond bud is a flag-shaped vane. The very top—the diamond bud—is tipped with a 76 carat (15 g) diamond.
The gold seen on the stupa is made of genuine gold plates, covering the brick structure and attached by traditional rivets.
The central stupa is surrounded by a myriad of other temples which makes for an overwhelming experience.
Whilst in Yangon I found a shop selling cycling clothes and decided a new pair of shorts would be in order as my Decathlon XXL pair had now stretched to the point they had taken up the appearance of a wet nappy when off the bike. Also, the second, worn through pair with the added modesty shorts had led to some chafing.
Anyway I managed to pick up a full Team Sky replica kit for an astonishing £11.49 I'm not sure this is genuine Rapha at this price but we'll see how it performs over the next thousand miles.
I checked out of my hotel and headed north for 11 miles through the city to pick up one of the recommended sights which was a pagoda situated on the river bank. I got into trouble when I arrived as a saw a canopy with bikes underneath so rode up to it only to have crossed the temple threshold with my shoes on oops!
The site itself was a bit underwhelming, a sort of collection of religious tableus many of which had been unsympathetically covered with canopies which spoiled the view. There was also a crocodile temple which were surrounded by tat stalls most not selling religious items just anything and everything but it was my shoes that caused offence!
I pushed on and eventually left the city jumping on the A1 which I rode on back to Bago which was busy but being a two/three lane highway. There was enough tarmac to go round though which was not the case for the route I took on my ride in.
I'd stocked up at breakfast so didn't required much fuel on the way but with 15 miles to go pulled in for some coke and seafood crackers. I was making good progress so took the opportunity to replace the studs in the pedals I had bought in Istanbul with some new machine screws I'd found at the Chinese market in Yangon.
I arrived back in Bago and at the hotel I had stayed at previously with the prospect of more peanut butter on toast in the morning.
I was early into breakfast as I was in the room next to the dining room so heard them setting up. After gorging myself on peanut butter and jam on toast I sat down to updated this blog which was a frustrating experience as the WiFi had slowed down and kept crashing. Eventually I got it done but it was 9.30 by the time I got going.
I had 60 miles to cover today and the roads were busy as I pushed back north through the city and past the novice monks again out in force for their morning collection.
I backtracked north another 15 miles then turned east and started heading towards Thailand where I must be by the 22 December when my permitted 28 days runs out.
The next collection I came across was one of many roadside fundraising efforts to construct a new stupa temple. It was interesting to see this one rising from the ground as a brick structure before the plaster and gold is added.
I had to make an emergency loo stop earlier in the day so played it safe with lunch and just bought a melon from a stall and pulled into a roadside shelter to eat it. I was finishing the first half when this guy appeared and asked for a slice so we shared the second half between us.
I soon homed in on my destination Kyaiko which is not easy to miss as it currently has the tallest sitting Buddha towering above the town. The terrain started to get more hilly and it wasn't soon before I was draining my water and sweat was pouring off me as I progressed across a changed and organised landscape of rubber plantations.
I rolled through the town to get these pictures and then called in at hotel further down the road which turned out to be too expensive. I had to backtrack west to a guest house with a bar next door where I was able to secure a room and a cold beer!
Looks like Buddha is currently having some dental work done.
Or maybe they are attempting to jack up his head as I suspect this bad boy below which I found under construction up in the north of the country is about to steal his crown when work is completed.
OK 75 miles to cover today to get to the city of Hpa-An where I would take a day off before the final day or so in order to reach the Thailand border on the 22nd.
So I had an early breakfast and got on the roads passing the sitting Buddha again as I left the town. I then travelled through another region of bamboo furniture on the first sector of the morning with stall after stall along the roadside selling all manners of goods.
My first break of the day was at one of the many new petrol station along the route that have mini marts attached. Here I got a bottle of pop and was drawn towards the ice cream fridge as the temperature was rising. I couldn't decide between the strawberry and peanut Magnum and the banana one so got them both and did a taste test sat on the pavement outside.
I managed to bag a couple more temples on the way another head to head between the Buddhist and Hindus again today you decide.
There was a bat cave shown five miles from the finish which I thought would be worth stopping at on the way but further investigation revealed that the best time to visit was at dusk then the bats left the cave to start their evenings foraging.
I was on target to get there about 3 pm so decided against hanging around in my sweaty cycling gear for
a couple of hours so thought I'd ride back tomorrow and pick it up then.
So with the pressure off I stopped for some tea all the cafes here have little flasks on the table which they keep topped up so you just help yourself.
At the last stop I tried to use my menu picture to order some chicken fried rice when the guy responded in perfect English "yes we have Thai chicken fried rice if that is OK?" I felt such a fool as I should have check whether he spoke English first! The food was delicious and I asked for seconds then cycled the last leg into the city of Hpa-An taking three attempts to find a hotel.
When I did I had a laugh when the owner asked his daughter to get my bike which was lent against a rack and her face just trying to get it upright had us in stitches.
I had a quick shower washed my kit and headed out on the stripped down bike which was a treat to cover the mile back to the river to see the sunset. I just made it!
During my day off in Hap-An I got my CV up to date and fired it off applying for a job when I return which is a sure sign my gap year is coming to an end.
I then took a walk around before cycling back to the bat cave which I found without much trouble and was early so managed to get in what I thought was a prime position. More people arrived some with guides who ushered them to sit beyond me on the temple. Some locals arrived and one when into the the cave via a door at the base and started to rouse the bats out. This spoiled the moment a bit but when they came, my word they came streaming out.
There were other locals outside banging plastic drums on one side and scraping tins on the other which you can hear in the video. I think this was to encourage the bat away from the cave in the line you can see the reason I found out. It started to rain where I was stood but then I realised that there were a million bats coming out and relieving themselves on the wing as they left. I moved sharpish from under the column of peeingbnbats and into the dry!
Unfortunately on my ride to the caves my phone fell out on the holder I've made for the fourth time but landed face up. I thought I'd got away without any damage but it was only when I started taking photos I realised that the glass on the back around the camera lens was smashed so this video is out of focus and I am down to one camera left on my iPhone!
Right back on the bike and time for the last push out of Myanmar. It was 80 miles to the border and a bit lumpy which often seems to be the case as you reach the natural limits of a country. So the plan was to cover the 55 miles to Kawkareik today and then the remainder to the border tomorrow which was the last day of my visa.
I got on the road, the condition was OK with some rough tarmac and started to wind through the hills with a succession of climbs and drops which slowed my pace as well.
At my first break I rehydrated at another service station with a shop and treated myself to a more traditional look a like Magnum with peanuts very nice!
The road at this stage had improved and was now pretty new smooth tarmac so the going was good to firm so I decided I would snack through the day and have a late lunch when I got to my destination.
I spoke too soon as about halfway through the day the newly built road ran out and I ended up in a construction site where, as before when I entered the country, the existing traffic had to drive around the work in progress.
It was as you can expect hard going but then got harder as I caught up with the dreaded water tanker who was spraying the road. The dirt road was well compacted to didn't turn to mud this time but the water made the surface like sheet ice and I was struggling to control my bike.
I came up behind the tanker but the peacock tail of water from the back continued so there was no way to get past. Then the inevitable happened the road widened out so I thought I could get passed approached but the bike just disappeared from under me and I was left sprawled on my back in the red water.
Thankfully there was no traffic around and the next car stopped to see if I was alright. I was and got my bike to the roadside where I sorted things out including putting my phone and pannier back in place. I noticed that the road absorbed the water pretty quickly so I stayed there for 5-6 more minutes until it was safe to continue.
I found the tanker parked up a few miles ahead stopped and showed them the state of me and in my best Mr Bean sign language tried to get across to them that they should have pulled over and turned the water off but they just laughed at me, charming!
I carried on through the dust and dirt ahead where is a water tanker when you need one! The answer was coming up behind me like a scene from the movie Duel! Oh no I thought those two clowns will be out for another chance to tip me off so I quickened my pace. Who need motivation? I managed to hold them at bay until I got to a narrow section where the traffic was stop start but I was able to squeeze through, the tanker fell back and disappeared from my mirror never to be seen again.
After 25 miles of roadworks I eventually pulled onto the A85 which was a proper road and soon arrived in Kawkareik. I was looking forward to a shower and a late lunch but unfortunately the first two guest houses I tried were full. There was a third shown but I couldn't find it so I thought let's just get some food and look for a place to camp. Whilst eating some vermicelli I looked at the route ahead and there was another guest house shown 7-8 miles away it was 4 pm so I stocked up with water just in case and made the dash east.
It was not to be though, as I left town the road started to climb and I remembered in the profile there was 5-6 miles of this and with my speed down to 5 mph I would not reach the guest house by dusk. If I was not able to get in there I would then be setting up camp in the dark which as wild camping is illegal is not a good idea advertising your presence with a head torch especially with so many border guards around.
I found a spot where a spoil hill had been formed with a flat top and had to take off and shuttle my panniers and then my bike up to where I couldn't be seen.
I was putting my tent up but everything was covered in wet red mud. I was wondering how it had managed to get into my tent when I realised it was coming off me.
With the exertion of getting everything up the hill my sweat was liquifying the mud caked on me so I headed down into the valley through a plantation trying not to think how many snakes might be on my route and had a wash in the river below.
I looked like I'd been for a cheap spray tan at a shop in LIverpool before I stood in the water and gave myself a good wash down.
I got back to the tent as the sun was setting had a few pineapple biscuits from my stores for dinner and got my head down. Thailand tomorrow.
The next morning I awoke to a heavy dew which covered my tent and bags as there was not enough space to open out the vestibules and put them inside the tent. My extra efforts yesterday ment it was only 25 miles I had to cover today to get to the border city of Mae Sot in Thailand where I had booked into a hotel for four nights over Christmas. So with not a great target today and well hidden I took things easy and read my kindle for a while whilst I nibbled on some more biscuits and waited for the sun to dry everything.
That done I packed up and got on the road again but it was tough going with some steep climbs and a headwind holding me back. It looked like Myanmar was going to have a sting it it's tail as a battled on whilst being passed by more border guards or or something like that as they were in unmarked Toyota Hilux pickups but in camouflage gear with badges and lots of semi automatic weapons.
I remember Tommy in Mandalay saying the The Generals controlled the drug trade and wondered if there were here to suppress that trade or facilitate it and protect their generals share? All in all they reminded me more of the private armies of the drug cartels you see in the movies.
I had gone through a lot of water overnight and only had my drinking bottle left which was fast being drained by climbing these hills in the increasing heat from my late start. I pulled in at a shop but the owner was asleep in a hammock and couldn't be aroused. The next shop I stopped at had tin of Fanta but when I pointed at them the girl produced a Red Bull type drink I thought that will do and took three.
At this point her father appeared and waved 1,500 Kyat at me I gave this to the girl and then the father made it clear that was just for one can. That's 75p fair by UK prices but expensive in Myanmar terms, I thought lets try the Fanta again I know the price of that. 1,500 was still the answer from the farther which is three times the normal price so I got indignant put on my helmet and gloves and continued.
I remember being in Brazil with my friend Father Jim and trying to haggle over I think it was £12 for a hammock. He said is that not a fair price in your country, which it was, so why haggle? I have kept to that principle ever since but if someone is blatantly trying to rip me off I just walk away.
I made it to the crest and down the other side found a cafe where I got some fried rice as I'd burn off the biscuits and reasonably priced drinks then refreshed and refueled the last push was on.
The road thankfully flattened out and I hit a string of towns that led to the border where I changed my money and my wonderful Myanmar experience had come to an end.
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